I read somewhere that humans have a hard time processing things that require long timeframes. Past a certain amount of time, we just can’t make sense of things.
If I remember correctly —and I am very doubtful of my recollections—it is said this is the reason why ideas like compounding don’t make “sense” logically.
Apparently, we can only plan ahead so far for a future we cannot understand. We’re not good at predicting things.
I’ve been thinking a lot about this. About why even when I know what I should do every day to be in a different place in 5-10 years, I still have a hard time following through.
It’s annoying, to be honest.
It’s one thing to not know what you want to do with your life. It’s another thing for life to give you clues that are wasted simply because you cannot do what you know/understand you must do.
When I talk about this with people who know me well, they list things that are happening in my life that are taking time away from those other tasks that I believe I should be doing.
There is some truth in what they say. My new job, for instance, has required me to learn a lot more in the past 3 months than I have in the past 3 years.
My YouTube channel and writing have suffered.
Or have they? That’s what bothers me.
Because as much as there are things that I am making progress in and setbacks that have affected my output, there is a part of me that strongly believes I can be more efficient with my time and energy.
It’s that part that bugs me and requires me to find a way to understand time better.
And I think I am unto something.
Self-love
If you loved yourself, would you hurt yourself? Hopefully not.
Would you willingly put yourself in a situation that would be detrimental for you?
I remember this story about a doctor who was trying to get a diabetic patient to cut sugar from their diet. Their weight has increased drastically, they had a hard time climbing stairs. The doctor was worried this fifty-something-year-old would die relatively young simply because they couldn’t muster the will to change their diet and lifestyle.
Each week, the doctor would talk about this, and the patient would say they’d make the change. And every returning week the numbers would be worse.
Then one day, during the routine check, the doctor struck gold.
This patient’s son had just had a bouncing baby. The patient was super excited about the grandchild and couldn’t wait to hang out with them.
Towards the end of the visit, the doctor asked the patient:
”You know, if you don’t take measures to control your blood sugar, you may not be able to physically play with your grandchild or live long enough to watch them run around”
That hit home.
The doctor had found something that mattered to the patient. Something more important than their own life —their love for their grandchild.
Suffices to say the numbers changed after that for the better.
But how does this relate to self-love?
Two things.
We live in a world now where loving yourself often means indulging in things that are harmful in the name of “YOLO”.
Also, as much as we claim to love ourselves, our actions often don’t match in the long run. We don’t exercise as much or work on the things we care about, or gain skills we’re interested in —especially when these “good” investments take a long time to show results.
The clue I am stumbling upon is that like our patient, maybe the most powerful act of self-love is loving someone else enough to take action that improves our lives—for them.
Maybe we shouldn’t build businesses so we can travel, but so that we can spend time with our families.
Maybe eating healthy and exercising shouldn’t be about looking good, but having enough energy to be there for the people we love.
And in my case, maybe writing shouldn’t be about using my talent, but about helping my siblings and you, reading this, to realize that even as hard as life can be, you find joy in things as simple as struggling with life intellectually.
Maybe self-love is about other-love.
What do you think?
I wrote some things on Medium. I haven’t been able to publish on YouTube yet.
However, I would love to hear from you what you’d like to read from me. I’m lost in my own thoughts and struggling to get out of the fog.
I will push through—and it would be nice to write for you.
Here’s my most recent Medium Article:
“How Are You?” is a Loaded Question